11-9-10

I don’t know what to do now because everybody knows now (which is all my fault by the way) But there seems to be a few people that weren’t too happy with that. And I would honestly feel the same way though. I just kinda want to take back today and do it over. I should have never let everybody read that paper. I think I just got caught up in the moment, I let it all get to me. I do want to talk to him though because I just put his name all out there like that, which was pretty rude. Maybe I shouldn’t have done that because it’s like he was mad after that and didn’t talk to me at all. And it wasn’t one of those play- play mad either, it was something different, like I just don’t even care anymore its whatever. So I just completely fucked up another relationship. I tend to do that a lot though. So now all I want to do is talk to him and make sure he is ok with the fact that im writing about him publicly with people we know reading it. Especially now that everyone in our little crew knows. I can’t help thinking that I really fucked this one up, big time, I honestly feel bad about it!!! It’s like… everything was going good before I made this stupid thing. We were all going back to the way it was at the beginning of the school year.

          In closing, I think im just gonna forget about it. Go back to being friends because I don’t like awkward situations and I don’t like messing up friendships so I am just going o wash my hands with the whole thing. We are better off as friends anyway. That’s the best thing to do right about now.